Exactly! I am a christian, and I find that challenging what I believe and asking questions can make me a better person and strengthen my beliefs. And christians believe that God doesnt make the world cruel, it is satan whos responsible for that. Being a christina doesnt automatically make your life perfect, and heck nothing really can, but like Tanna I found that it makes me a better person for believing. It also keeps me away from a lot of junk in the world.
i'm mainly Deist, with quite a lot of Buddhist beliefs mixed in... and a little bit of my own. No religion completely fits my beliefs. -shrug-
and Enemy of god... what a rude way to voice your opinion O_o also, don't blame god for how we fucked up our society. in Deism, it explains that God is not involved in anything except in the creation of evolution sooo... in my beliefs he is not expected to do anything for us. we have made our own decisions throughout time; God shouldn't be used as a cripple to help us.
reason:
i believe that there are things that we will never know or be able to explain... how can we really say there is or isnt an afterlife until we reach that point... how do we know of god? we can not prove nor disprove a religion... i will never be a believer, but i will never be a non-believer either...
i was nothing as a child, a wiccan for 15 years, i became a christian 6 years ago, and now i am struggling with my faith. if god made us perfect, than how can who i am be a mistake? why should i have to live a lie and in hell to avoid hell? i'd say organized religion is the problem. too many rules, not enough ideas.
hope this doesn't sound like preaching, and I'm NOT trying to convert anyone, but my opinion, is that the reason for life is to experience all. God may be Omniscient (all knowing), and Omnipotent (All Powerful) but God has us all experiencing. we are perfect, perfectly flawed. I'm transgender, meaning I feel like all that is male on my body is a birth defect that I'm currently force to walk around with. I feel that the divine wants me to experience that set of circumstance, react to it, decide from it. I think when we die all our experiences get dumped into the divine as memory and then we reincarnate. I totally agree with you on the organized religion.
I'm an independant pagan, my beliefs are closest to that of Wicca though, so to save time I say I'm Wiccan. I've taken from many beliefs to work out my system of beliefs. People tell me I'm wrong but I don't care, it works for me. The only rules are the ones I decided make sense, and I'm open to the ideas of everyone else.
I'm not trying to preach here, but I recommend that instead of choosing a religion just choose your beliefs. It made things simple for me, it may not work for you. Life is all about learning, after all. This struggle might just be the next phase of your learning.
Hope that helps you work it all out.
Personally, I agree with your idea of organized religion. Catholicism was WAY too much for me, seeing as they'd say, "Well, we're made in the Image and Likeness of God" and then say, "Oh, but gays and bisexuals are evil, and God is a male." Uh-huh. The day I was Confirmed was the day I flipped off my church director as I walked out the door; pity the woman wasn't looking.
The thing is, I think God seriously gave us free will as a science experiment. We're fuck ups, but we're loved fuck ups. Hopefully. Otherwise, we're just fucked.
Christian. I attend a church of Christ in the town I live in, and believe the views of said church coincide with those in the Bible. I'm fully aware some people don't believe in the Bible or think it should be taken seriously, but to those who have serious questions about why I believe in the Bible, I'll be happy to answer them, or any questions about my beliefs. I'm friendly, conservative, and open minded [gasp!] :)